


honey lemon water

by thewalkingfish



Category: TWICE (Band)
Genre: Angst, Arranged Marriage, F/F, Tragic Minayeon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-13
Updated: 2018-11-13
Packaged: 2019-08-23 01:01:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,218
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16608863
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thewalkingfish/pseuds/thewalkingfish
Summary: Or, fate isn't on her side and Nayeon is always running late, even on Mina's wedding day.





	honey lemon water

**Author's Note:**

> Special thanks to Mina's short cover of Almost Is Never Enough for the inspiration boost. Hope you enjoy.

The first time Nayeon and Mina are supposed to meet, Nayeon is taking her sweet time talking to Chaeyoung from the creative design team about that new series on Netflix. It hasn’t crossed her mind that someone was waiting for her, lost in the maze of the office building. 

 

It takes a change of topic and for Dahyun to join their conversation before someone has to remind her, "Speaking of which, weren't you supposed to show the new employee around?" 

 

 _“Shit_ , I forgot.” 

 

To be fair, the task was initially supposed to be Jeongyeon's. Then again, Jeongyeon had emailed her the night before about how she had to attend an urgent meeting instead. Nayeon read the message and fell asleep right after, the information slipping in the middle of her dreams. 

 

When she reaches the floor of her department, trying her best to show that she hadn’t ran and that she wasn’t out of breath, the first person to greet her is Momo and her usual playful grin, “You're late.” 

 

“Sana's going to kill me, isn't she?” 

 

“Definitely. But hey, you’re lucky the new girl is pretty.” 

 

 _“_ _Nayeon_ ,” Sana appears behind her then, a sweet smile apparent even though her glare suggests something else, “This is Mina, she’ll be joining our team starting today. I trust that you can give her a tour of the office like you were supposed to?” 

 

“Of course, I'll take it from here. Thanks.” Nayeon mirrors Sana’s smile, at the same time accepting without a fight the daggers she is shooting through her eyes. When Sana walks away, Nayeon releases her breath and finally turns to Mina and  _woah–_ Momo wasn’t lying when she said the new girl is pretty. 

 

Like,  _really_  pretty.  

 

“Are you...going to show me around the office?” 

 

Nayeon is taken aback, both by her gummy smile and how kind and gentle her voice is, because Mina looks pretty yes, but also tough on first impression, intimidating if Nayeon were entirely honest. She snaps out of her daze and fakes a cough, swallowing the nervousness, “ _Right_ , sorry for making you wait. You can follow me.” 

 

After walking in silence, Nayeon figures soon enough that she is  _terrible_  at this. In fact, she is totally unprepared and it doesn’t help at all that she only knows her way around her cubicle, the washrooms and the employees’ resting lounge. As if she had read her mind and heard her cry for help, she sees Momo sticking her head out from her work space, mouthing the words “ _Just improvise,”_  with a thumbs up, to which Nayeon mentally rolls her eyes.  

 

 _Fuck it._  

 

 _“So_ , Mina.” Nayeon links her hands behind her back, internally cringing at the sweat forming on her palms. “Do you like warm water?” 

 

“...Yes? I guess.” Mina chuckles, uncertain on where the older girl was going with that. They keep walking until Nayeon stops in front of counters and cabinets. 

 

“Good. Because  _this_ ,” Nayeon points at the appliance, exaggerating her hand movements and showing it like it was an artifact at a museum, “is the broken coffee machine. Apparently the boss prefers investing in bean bags and eco-friendly toilet paper so we’re stuck with an electric kettle and an empty box of organic tea. I just thought I had to tell you because some people can get cranky when they don’t get their daily dose of caffeine.” 

 

There is a pause, before Mina laughs. When Mina stepped inside the office, she expected to be shown to her desk or to fill in paperwork and small tasks,  _not_  the coffee machine. Correction, the _broken_ coffee machine. “Sure, I can deal with that. Thanks for letting me know.”  

 

“Also, she can’t be here right now, but Jeongyeon will be the one to train you on-the-job. But if you have any questions feel free to ask me. Oh, I’m Nayeon, by the way.”  

 

“I’m Mina. Pleased to meet you,” Mina smiles. 

 

The formal introduction officially breaks the ice and they spend the next half hour, with Nayeon introducing Mina to the other employees and telling embarrassing anecdotes about each one of them. Nayeon finds out that the easiest way to make Mina comfortable is by making her laugh, and so she makes it her personal mission. 

 

Their first meeting is awkward and clumsy, like the first waltz where you’re afraid of stepping on your partner’s foot, but they are both patient and willing to learn step by step. And sometimes, that’s all it takes to dance together.   
 

- 

 

A few weeks later, it becomes a part of their routine to meet in front of the broken coffee machine. Mina greets her, a smile too bright for a gloomy Monday morning, but bright enough that it makes Nayeon forget about her own fatigue. Nayeon doesn’t notice the new ring on Mina’s finger or how there’s actually something different about the way Mina looks at her, tired with a hint of longing. 

 

Jeongyeon, though, is the one to break the news during their lunch break. “Did you hear? Mina got engaged last weekend. That’s why she took the day off on Friday.” 

 

“What?” Nayeon almost drops her spoon. “Where did you hear that? Why didn’t she tell me this morning?” 

 

“Well you know how she is, she probably didn’t want to draw attention on herself. Someone noticed the ring though and that’s what everyone’s been talking about since.” 

 

 _Oh._  

 

It’s the next day that Nayeon notices the engagement ring on Mina's finger, when the younger girl greets her in front of the broken coffee machine, a cup of steaming water in her hand. And if Nayeon notices the engagement ring, she doesn’t mention it, doesn’t ask about it and simply greets her back with a new-found itch right next to her heart.  

 

Nayeon doesn’t mention it until months later, during their office Christmas party when she is tipsy and words just come easier. After dinner, they decide to escape outside on the restaurant’s terrace, with an overlook of the night’s skyscrapers. Mina has her coat draped on her shoulders. In contrast, Nayeon is feeling warm thanks to the wine and their proximity. 

 

“I never got to tell you, but congrats on your engagement.” 

 

Mina’s lips form a thin line, barely a smile, “Thanks.” 

 

“You don’t seem that excited?”   
 

She sighs, “It’s complicated.” 

 

“Tell me about it, please.” 

 

Mina tells her about the engagement, tells her about how she is to marry a man she wouldn’t choose if she truly had the choice, but that her parents deemed suitable, the  _least worst_  of all the suitors. It’s a convenient marriage for the Myoui family, but damn inconvenient for Nayeon and the blooming garden of flowers, butterflies and feelings growing inside her.  

 

“What about him? Is he good to you?” 

 

“He's nice.” 

 

“You deserve more than nice, Mina.” 

 

Nayeon knows it isn’t her place to talk, knows that it wouldn’t change anything anyway. But Mina smiles at that, her gaze soft and her words just quiet enough only for the two of them to hear, like the world would punish her if she were to speak louder. 

 

“Nayeon.” 

 

“Yeah?”   
 

“Sometimes, I wish we had met sooner.” 

 

“Would that change anything?” The question slips before she can stop it. 

 

If it were sooner, perhaps Mina would be the girl Nayeon wakes up next to every morning, the same girl that would scold their dogs for making a mess, and the one that would laugh at Nayeon for not knowing how to work their new espresso machine, making both of them late for work.    
 

There is silence before Mina speaks again. “I don’t know.” 

 

But even if they knew, the circumstances still made it so Nayeon and Mina met each other too late in their lives, in their late twenties, when they have most of their future figured out. 

 

Career-oriented, Nayeon was going to wait for her next promotion before moving out from the small apartment she shares with Jihyo. She was going to buy her own place downtown and travel the world, living on discoveries and learning  _love_  in ten different languages. And though she doesn't think of settling down, family, was going to be her dog and her future girlfriend, and perhaps another dog or a cat, snuggled up in bed on a breezy and crisp morning of autumn, in a place they can go back to and call home. 

 

Mina, on the other end, imagined a simple life. Married, a happy family of four and the weekends spent at her parents’ house so her children could grow up knowing their grandparents. They would enjoy the summer heat in their vacation house back in Japan, just like she did during her childhood. Mina, imagined and seeked a life of comfort and stability. Because it's what she has always known and her engagement will bring her exactly that. 

 

And that's where the difference between Nayeon and Mina lies. Nayeon is open to the unforeseen, open to the unexpected, even in the form of a gummy smile and hands brushing inside the office’s cramped elevator at eight in the morning. But Mina never ponders about the endless possibilities of turning left instead of right. Mina has everything set from the start, and Nayeon can't possibly fit into Mina's plans for the future.   
 

“There’s something I want to give you though.” Mina searches in her pocket and takes out a small box from her coat before handing it to Nayeon, “Merry Christmas.” 

 

Her eyes widen, “Mina, you didn’t have to–”  

 

“Open it.” 

 

Nayeon hesitates at first. She opens the box, suddenly aware of how her hands are nearly freezing, to reveal a rose gold watch, the band made of brown leather. “A watch? Mina, it’s... beautiful. Thank you.” 

 

“Now you can’t give the excuse that you forgot the time, okay? And I know what you’re going to say but don’t worry about not getting me anything, your company is enough.”   
 

It’s sincere and Nayeon feels something pull at her heartstrings. The snow starts falling then, slowly and endlessly like they have all the time in the world.  

 

“You’ll catch a cold, come here.”  

 

Nayeon doesn't even notice that she is shivering until Mina gets closer and brings her inside her coat. With Mina brushing the snow off her hair, her eyes filled with hope and sharing body heat, everything hits Nayeon like a storm and she realizes one thing.  

 

She fell in love with someone she can not have. 

 

Nayeon fell in love with encouraging words on penguin-shaped post-its sticking on her desk and good mornings by the broken coffee machine.    
 

Nayeon fell in love with the way Mina’s eyes form the crescent moon when she laughs at her lame jokes, fell in love with the way Mina frowns and lets out a muttered "Eh?" when the photocopier prints twenty copies of the same page instead of two. And if she wasn’t into astronomy before, Nayeon fell in love with Cassiopeia and the way it shines on the sky named Mina, the stars unreachable and yet grazing her fingertips if she extends her arm far enough. 

 

But sometimes falling in love  _isn’t_  enough. Because Nayeon never dares steal the moon or cross the line between the ground and the Heavens. Nayeon never asks Mina to jump with her into the unknown and whatever the world has to offer and  _screw_  the circumstances. 

 

And so, Mina always settles for warm water. 

 

- 

 

On Mina’s wedding day, Nayeon arrives two hours late. 

 

It’s in the middle of July, a day Nayeon has prepared for since the moment she realized a seed had been planted in her heart. Still, the months of mental preparations turn out to be useless because it never erases the fact that it  _hurts_ and that she is attending a wedding that isn’t hers. 

 

In the two hours where she was supposed to be at the banquet hall, Nayeon spent more time than necessary looking at herself in the mirror and retouching her makeup, lying down on her bed and staring up at ceiling, wearing and removing the watch from her wrist. Nayeon contemplated not going at all, thinking of excuses like she fell sick or that her neighbor’s cat died. She knew she was acting like a coward, a selfish one at that, but she thought that maybe not going would be for the best. Then she thought about Mina, thought of how she would feel if Nayeon didn’t show up, and decided that the guilt and facing her at work afterwards would be worse.   
 

So, Nayeon arrives two hours late at the wedding with a peach-colored dress and her wrist free of accessories, her makeup flawless and hiding perfectly well the fact that she hadn’t properly slept the night before.   
 

The wedding reception is something out of a fairytale, with more than four-hundred people, everything white and decorated with bouquets of roses, rather than Mina’s favorite cherry blossom petals. It’s pretty, Nayeon can admit that. 

 

“Champagne?” a caterer suddenly stands in front of her.   
 

“Thanks.”  _I’ll need it._  Nayeon grabs a glass and scans the room for her friends and co-workers. She spots Sana laughing at something Momo said and heads towards their table, preparing herself for their nagging on her lateness.  

 

“Nayeon?” 

 

Nayeon halts her steps, the voice entirely too familiar. She turns around, an entire speech of excuses ready on why she is late, but when Nayeon finally sees her, the sight of Mina in her wedding dress, she is left breathless and the butterflies are threatening to escape from her chest. 

 

Mina pulls Nayeon in a hug, holding her like they haven’t met in years. “I was worried you weren’t going to make it.” 

 

“I wouldn't miss it for the world.” Nayeon thinks she is going to suffocate the moment the lie is out, until Mina breaks the hug and squeezes her free hand, holding it as long as she can before she has to greet other guests. “You look beautiful.” Nayeon adds in a whisper and for a moment she thinks she has lost her voice too. Mina leans closer, motioning that she didn't hear amidst the chatters and the loud music. Nayeon tells her again, this time closer to her ear, and close enough so Mina won't see the way her eyes glitter, like the moonlight reflects on the riverbed on a summer night. “You  _are_  beautiful.” 

 

Nayeon thinks she feels the warmth of Mina's cheek brushing against her own, the hint of a blush, but as soon as the groom arrives and wraps his arm around her shoulder, Nayeon knows she has to forget the thought. 

 

“Nayeon, right? It’s nice to finally meet you,” he says, and Nayeon doesn't tell him that the feeling isn’t mutual. “Mina only had good things to say about you.” 

 

“It’s nice to meet you too,” she replies back, a fake smile appearing right after despite the last statement making her heart skip a beat. “Congratulations on your wedding.” 

 

Mina never leaves her eyes off Nayeon, “I’ll see you around?” 

 

“Of course.” 

 

Nayeon misses the warmth as soon as Mina let go of her hand. 

 

- 

 

Nayeon goes missing for half of the night, excusing herself every now and then because the room felt too hot and she needed air. No one questions her, even though she catches Jeongyeon and Momo exchanging worried looks whenever she would leave and come back gradually tipsier than when she had left. 

 

It’s almost midnight when Nayeon returns to the banquet hall with another flute of champagne in her hand. She sits on an empty chair next to Tzuyu, the latter jet-lagged from her business trip but still managing to look as gorgeous as ever. 

 

She thinks it’s almost ironic, how Tzuyu is barely at the office, always boarding planes and meeting foreign clients, and yet she’s the only person who caught on Nayeon’s feelings for Mina. It didn’t take much for the younger girl to put the links together, though. Not when she had found Nayeon crying inside the office’s washroom, clutching the wedding invitation card in her trembling hand. Tzuyu had locked the washroom door without a second thought and took Nayeon in her arms, silently comforting her until the tears stopped falling. 

 

Nayeon knows Tzuyu is that one person she can’t fool with her lies, but she tries anyway. “This is the best wedding,  _ever_.” 

 

“Have you been drinking the whole night?” 

 

“Hmm,” Nayeon downs her drink, caught red-handed. “ _Touché_. Is that what they say in France when you get a bullet shot through your heart and you’re feeling  _fucking_  pathetic because you saw it coming from miles away? You should know, you’ve been to France before.” 

 

“Unnie, I think you’ve had enough,” Tzuyu says before taking Nayeon's drink from her hand, shooing the waiter from behind her away and preventing him from refilling her glass, “Why don't you go dance a bit?” 

 

It only takes a little push from Tzuyu for Nayeon to join the dance floor. The lights are dim and Nayeon can’t make out anything but silhouettes and shadows moving in sync to the beat. For a moment she does the same and it’s easy to forget the pain, to just let the music guide her body. She sways her hips, closes her eyes and tries to remember the feeling of not being trapped, of being free and what exactly happened to following her heart? 

 

And then Mina finds her, smiles at her and it makes Nayeon's knees tremble and everything much more difficult. Mina reaches for her hand, pulling her close into a world where it feels like it’s just the two of them, and the pain is still there but Mina’s touch feels like a remedy to her wounds. 

 

“Where were you? I’ve been looking for you.” 

 

Mina’s perfume makes her head spin and Nayeon wants nothing more than to kiss her and grab her hand and  _run away_. For, there’s nowhere else Nayeon would rather be than right by Mina’s side, where she belongs. But Nayeon knows it's not enough. It will never be enough. Even so, the feelings are eating at her from the inside, the scars running deeper and deeper, and a part of her can’t hold it anymore, “Mina, I...” 

 

Nayeon is thrown back to reality when the people cheer and the song changes to a slower tune. It happens too fast and she can’t register what happens next, but all she knows is that Mina is pulled away by the groom for a slow dance. Then it’s dark again, the music buzzing in her ears like she is being sucked into a void, alone and lost in the sea of tuxedos and evening dresses.  

 

All she knows, is that this is what it feels like, to lose someone she never had. 

 

- 

 

Mina never gets to hear Nayeon say the words  _I love you_ , whether in secret or out loud like it’s supposed to be, the same way Nayeon never gets to see Mina searching for her in the crowd on her wedding night, or the way Mina drops honey and lemon in her water every morning, in hope that Nayeon would be the one to paint her world in colors she’s never seen before. 

 

Nayeon is always too late, anyway. 

   
 

 


End file.
